Killington On My Mind...

I'm not sure I even know what to say anymore. We've gone through so much, and seem to have been jinxed from the start. The boy had finally moved to the same city as me and then got deployed. Came home to propose on leave, and the ring was stuck in Chicago in a blizzard. I got it the day he left to go back to Afghanistan. He was ready to start training again and got injured. We've had an earthquake and a hurricane in one week. And the day we get his start date for training again, we get a call.

Have you seen the recent Irene coverage? Of course you have. Have you seen Killington? That aerial footage of the washed out road, where 3 lanes just fell away and now there's a 20-foot cliff instead? That's the road that leads into Killington. Into my wedding.

Killington, where I relax, where I worked two years in a ski shop, where I learned the magic of skiing on Tuesdays (the visitors are gone and the Beast of the East is mine, mine, mine), where I have a second home, and more importantly, a second family. Killington is essentially an island. Literally every road has been washed out, wiped away. They've been airlifting supplies in. 3 days later, they've managed to open one lane, in one direction, for one hour each day, so that those who are stranded can leave and those providing emergency care can enter.

We got the call today that due to the condition of roads, and all the destruction, events are the Killington Grand are canceled through September 17, no questions asked. My wedding is supposed to be the 18th. We were told that they could have the facility open. They could *probably* have staff and food. But, well, they have no idea. And they have absolutely no idea when the roads will be restored, in order to deliver the needed food, the staff, the vendors, the guests.

I'm working on plan B. And plan C. But really? Really, I'm tired. I'm tired of plan Bs and Cs and all the little things adding up, over and over, and over. I'm tired of being unemployed, panicking about every dime I spend and oops, they might all be wasted. I'm tired of being supportive, of dealing with everyone else's stress about their family that's coming, or their friends that are coming, or this that and the other thing.  And I'm tired because I don't know what happened to Vermont.  I can't even expend my energy in the only way that still seems desirable. I can't get up there to help. And oh yeah, I lost my job 3 weeks ago, so I don't even have the financial means to help.

So today, I can't lift anyone else up anymore. I can't smile and support you. I will again soon, I know it. But today, I'm gonna just lay where I fell for a little bit. You just let me lay here. Ok?  Go pick up Vermont. Because as much as this sucks, it's not about me. I don't really, truly have it that bad. So go check out the Town of Killington's website, and donate. Because they're resilient, but we could all use a hand to help us up.