Moving On Up...

To Michigan! I've been MIA, I know. But the move to Michigan is complete, we are first-time homeowners, and my lingering unemployment allowed me to fix the house fairly quickly.

The move went very smoothly. The cats were well-behaved, if scared. We stopped at a rest stop and discovered that one cat was actually shaking in her carrier. When we opened the door, she hopped out, hunkered down in some soft items right below her carrier and was fine. Aside from one day of hiding in a closet, both girls have adjusted very well to their new home!

We chose a nice suburb of Detroit with plenty of restaurants and parks. I have to say, these two Midwest kids are loving that we have a yard and trees again. For the first time in years, I have neighbors that I've actually met, who say hello and bring over 'welcome to the neighborhood' flowers instead of just glaring at me when we pass in the apartment hallway!

Anyway, on to the fun stuff...  Painting!  I used all Behr Ultra paints (the paint + primer). I've included the colors just in case you love them as much as I do. Here's a quick look at before and after in our home:

The front door opens into a decent-sized front room. Back in the 40s, when the home was built, this was probably their main gathering room, but since our home had a large 'great room' addition in the back, we decided to turn this one into a study. The hardwood floors and coved ceiling? Awesome. The weird yellow/tan color and maroon-ish drapes? Not awesome. 

So I painted it grey! The color worked out fantastically! It feels more open and peaceful. I've since hung a few pictures, and may add white drapes later..   

Paint Color: Ashes. 

There is actually a large room upstairs (seemed to be a common feature in homes we looked at) which runs the width of the house, and has angled ceilings. We eventually intend to use that as the Master, but right now it is painted lavender, and has almost no storage. Temporarily, we are using a downstairs bedroom as ours. And it came with more of that icky golden tan color...

Green! I did worry this color would be too dark, but it is still muted enough that it works very well  (this picture is a bit dark). We will use this color upstairs as we fix up the room for our use.   

Paint Color:  Sanctuary

 We haven't fixed up the kitchen yet. One of our earlier projects will likely be a complete kitchen remodel. Despite its large size, we've found that the cabinets are not very good, counterspace is wasted, which doesn't leave enough for canisters and small appliances, there is no actual pantry, so we have to use a small rolling pantry that is not roomy enough, and while the appliances all work, they're an off-white color that makes them look incredibly old. Not to mention, the faucet drips when turning it off, and the side cabinets are slightly drooped and the previous owner added a light that she screwed up through the bottom of the cabinet...

The deck also has a patio portion next to it. We need to clean it, get some furniture/decor, and add a grill, but nothing too major out there. I can't wait to plant my vegetable garden!

Ah, the great room. (You can see the kitchen to the right... we will definitely put in half cabinets and extend the counter to open that up). This room made me happy (it's huge), and crazy (the fireplace mantle is red, the room is that icky golden tan the previous owner seemed to love).  This took the longest, and was delayed a few days when I dropped a sign on my toe, cracking the nail (it's a different color now too!).

Love! Ok, don't judge me on the tiny portion on the right wall. Me + 6 foot ladder still was not tall enough to reach it. My husband and his extra 8 inches will fix that this weekend.   So first, we painted the mantle an espresso brown color (I'm somewhat obsessed with espresso brown, it's OK). After way too many color swatches and some nervousness that we went too bold, we chose a gorgeous blue. I actually could not be happier with this color. It works with the espresso brown and white, I can easily add nautical accents in the living room side, and  (not pictured), it looks great with my espresso brown leaning wine bar AND the greens and tans that make up our dining set.

Paint Color (mantle): French Roast

Paint Color (walls): Juniper Ash


Now, I just need to find a job! And remodel the kitchen. And create a man cave in the basement. And fix the Master Bedroom. And plant my garden.   Stay tuned, the (mis)adventures continue...

Paleo Spaghetti Squash Toss...

Like the rest of the U.S., we here in DC have been blessed with summer temperatures. In March. I bought meat for chili, but no one wants chili when it's 76 out. So, I tried to come up with summer recipes, found something that sounded good, tweaked it, and got this...

Ingredients:

1 spaghetti squash

2 chicken breasts

1 medium tomato

1 can black olives

1 small onion

1/2 cup feta cheese

1 tsp olive oil

Garlic to taste

Heat your oven to 350 degrees. Cut the spaghetti squash in half and remove the seeds. Brush the inside of each half with olive oil, sprinkle with garlic, salt, pepper, etc.  Place the halves face down on a cookie sheet and bake for at least 30 minutes.  You will know it's done when you can pierce the outside skin with little resistance, or flip a half over and see if the flesh is tender. 

While the squash is cooking, do your prep work. Slice the olives and dice the tomatoes and onion.

Once done slicing, dice the chicken. I find it's easiest to get bite-sized slivers if I cut the breasts while they're raw, using my totally awesome Wusthoff chef's knife. 

I found it easiest to wait until the squash was out of the oven before I started the chicken portion. The squash needs time to cool, which can lead to too much down time. You do not need or want to serve this dish piping hot. Do whatever works best for you and your kitchen time management. 

Once the squash pieces are cooled, use a fork to scrape out the fleshy parts. You can scrape in any direction, it will still come out in spaghetti-like strands. I suggest you scrape directly into the serving bowl.

Now, put the chicken pieces into a pan with just a little olive oil. Just enough to keep it from sticking. Cook through.

Add the diced onion and cook until the onion is just tender. Add the tomatoes and cook until they are just heated (I like my tomatoes to stay firm, so I suggest you do not overcook).

Add the chicken, tomatoes, and onions to the spaghetti squash. Add the tsp. of olive oil and your desired amount of garlic. Toss. Add the feta and olives and toss again. 

Serve!  It isn't the prettiest dish ever, but it got glowing reviews from two hungry men. 

Help...

I wasn't going to do it. I wasn't going to blog or comment on the situation in Afghanistan. Where a Staff Sergeant apparently walked into an Afghan village and proceeded to shoot and kill 16 Afghan civilians. I wasn't going to add my voice, say what's already been said, or try to say something new. And then I saw this:

http://www.newseum.org/todaysfrontpages/hr.asp?fpVname=NY_DN&ref_pge=gal&b_pge=1

Truly, what offended me first was the actual headline. Boom, "Sergeant Psycho". In letters so large and bold that you notice nothing else on the page. Not the photograph, not the ad at the bottom, not the secondary headline. Just "Sergeant Psycho".

Stop and think about that for a minute. "Psycho". Early reports are that this soldier was on his 4th deployment in 11 years of service. There is a report that he had been diagnosed with PTSD, but declared fit for duty. Even if these reports were untrue, or simply unknown, a rational person immediately knows and understands that it is not a rational person who walks off a base at 3 a.m. and kills 16 civilians. A soldier, a man with a wife and two kids, does not take this action in a normal state of mind. And the New York Daily News feels it appropriate to derogatorily label this man a psycho.

"Psycho". Forget what could have caused him to do this, forget what our military has been through, done and seen over the course of these wars. Forget that this soldier comes from Ft. Lewis, well known and making the headlines regularly for its failure to help and protect our guys. Forget what could have caused this soldier to become unbalanced enough to commit this act. "Psycho." It does not boil down to something so simple, so un-empathetic, so judgmental, so cruel.

After I sort through my disgust at the headline, I focus on the secondary headline. "Killer G.I. had suffered traumatic brain injury."  Now process that. What is the reader's reaction? Just as the media has recently led us to believe that every veteran has PTSD, and this somehow makes them evil, crazed people who could snap and kill us at any moment, the NY Daily News seems ready to have us believe that we should link traumatic brain injury (TBI) and "Psycho" or "Killer". No? There it is in black and white. "Psycho". "Killer". "Traumatic brain injury".

I have seen firsthand TBI. PTSD. I've seen the irritability, the fear and tension brought into what used to be normal, everyday situations. I've seen the headaches, the tinnitus (ringing in the ears) that TBI leaves behind. I've seen the flashes of anger. And I've seen that our military community needs help. They've taken the weight of these wars and carried them alone. They've gone from war to home to war to home. Back again, over and over. They've carried with them the pain of leaving their families, the fear of war, the adrenaline of war, the difficulties caused when you dive into a war, but life keeps going at home. They carried back with them the things they've seen, they've done, the hurts physical and mental, seen and unseen.  And they've come home to a world where society doesn't understand a thing about them, where society (in general) doesn't care. They come home and spend whatever little time they have at home listening to the stupid, insensitive comments of civilians who don't understand, many of whom don't care to understand. They've come home to a VA that can't or won't help them. TBI demands help. Yet I've seen firsthand a soldier who called the VA only to have the phone answered by a woman who didn't even know what TBI is or the meaning of PTSD.

And they've come home to a failed system. A system that doesn't take care of them. That in some cases punishes them for admitting they need help. A system that quite simply has failed to help them.  At Ft. Lewis, where this soldier was based, a number of veterans (the report stated the number is as high as 2,400) were diagnosed with PTSD and then had this diagnoses reversed. Not because they had been helped. Not because the diagnosis was wrong. Because the doctor became concerned about the cost of paying benefits to and caring for these veterans. Rather than give them the help they needed, the doctor simply reversed their diagnosis, claimed it was all OK.

I am not, do not, and will not condone what this Staff Sergeant did. I do not think there is any time or condition where we can say that it's OK, release him of all fault, or let it slide. Regardless of how the system may or may not have failed him, this soldier killed 16 innocent civilians. He deserves, and will receive, some level of punishment. But he also deserves a fair review. He deserves and has earned the right to have a mental evaluation, a real offer of a help. He deserves for us to gather all the facts, to see if he was failed, or if he acted without hint of reason. He does not deserve "Psycho".

More than anything else, we must learn from this. We have a choice laid before us. The circumstances around this choice have escalated. We've had kill squads, we've had suicides, we've had suicide-by-cop. And now this. These men have not failed us. We have failed these men. We must deal appropriately with this soldier and we must finally make the change. Step it up. Fix the VA. Fix the mentality. Help these guys carry the weight. Stop assuming and inferring that PTSD/TBI = "Psycho", "Killer". Help.

An Update...

Boring post alert.

First, I've been a terrible blogger. I'd like to tell you I've been busy, but I haven't been *that* busy. As a housewife with no children and not even a house yet, I spend most of my days sitting around, frustrated, trapped, but not really that busy.

The husband finished his training, finally. I'm extremely proud of him, and I'm glad to have him truly home, finally.

We are preparing for our move to Detroit. In good news, we bought our first home!  It took a ton of frustration, too many trips up there, and one change of realtor, but we found a place we truly like in a great neighborhood. I'm still searching for a job, which is beyond frustrating. The listings are not good, pickings are slim, the jobs that are interesting are still a few years experience beyond me. I'm doing my best to stay optimistic. God is in control and has good plans for me. I just wish his timeline was a little closer to mine sometimes!

I yet again vow to try an be a better blogger, but we all know how that goes. There are some big adventures coming up, so I'll do my best to share them..

The Itch...

Who would've thought that all the drama, confusion, and stress of buying your first home would actually be a good thing? Right now, I am so thankful for the distraction it provides.

There is a monster stalking us. It's hiding in the shadows. Creeping behind me, ducking out of the way when I turn around to look. Freezing so still if we manage to look right at it that it blends in and can't be seen.

One year ago at this time, he was in Afghanistan. (Ok, exactly one year ago, he was home on leave, and about to see, and propose to, me.) Two years ago at this time, he was headed toward Fort McCoy for pre-deployment training. Three years ago at this time, he was in Afghanistan, a few months from what would've been the end of his tour, and only a couple weeks from being medvac'ed out of country. Four years ago at this time, we were gearing up, getting ready for his first trip to McCoy, his first deployment, the start of a wild journey.

This post is not about my usual Reserve vs. Active Duty issues. Forget that. Just know that, even though it says "Reserves" in my blog description, my husband's tours came at the pace of Active Duty tours. Know that when they said "go", he went, because that was his job. That's what he volunteered to do. And know that when he came home, he was home for exactly a year when they said "go" again.

In theory, we are done. We are IRR, and POTUS tells us all the time how he's winding down the war in Afghanistan. In theory, they will not tell my soldier "go" again.  But still, I wait.

I wait because I've been trained to wait. I wait because I've learned that this is the point where the cycle repeats itself. I wait because he is an experienced NCO and units will have holes to fill. I wait because, even though Iraq is over, and most of America thinks that means all war is done and they can completely forget about it yet again, still they go.

That monster is stalking us. We've mentioned his presence, but assured ourselves he won't get us. But he's there. I see how the monster effects us, whether we notice or not, whether we acknowledge or not, whether we think things are connected or not. The SGT has acknowledged that parts of him feel like it's time to go back. Part of him wants to be back there. Part of him thinks it's time to ramp up and train again. I see him watch war movies more than usual. He acknowledged how hard it is, how disconcerting it is that he does not have his rifle everywhere he goes.

I feel it creeping in. I feel an urge to push him away on Valentine's Day. I feel a peace that he will be at training that Tuesday instead of with me. I feel myself prepping to be alone, not just on weekends, but always. I feel that I am retreating into myself because I am all I can rely on, and it's easier than stressing him.

I wait because I feel that monster lurking behind me. Because even though all logic tells me we are done, I don't know when I can ever be sure. Because even with the lights on, there just aren't enough lights right now to convince me that there is no monster under my bed.

Paleo Scallops and Bacon...

So tonight I had no idea what to cook. But I had scallops, and it was cook or freeze time. I also had bacon, of course. I rummaged around a bit and stumbled upon a dish...

Ingredients
1/2 lb diver scallops (smaller size)
2 slices bacon cut into bite-size pieces
1/4 C. red onion, finely sliced
1/8 C. mushrooms, diced
1/2 C. yellow squash, sliced then quarted
Olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper

Pour approximately 1 Tbsp olive oil in your saucepan. Add garlic (approx. 1 clove), a few shakes of salt and pepper and heat. Once pan is hot, add scallops.  Cook until they begin to take a golden color.  Remove scallops and set aside.

Add bacon to pan. Cook until nearly done. Add scallops and veggies. Sautee together until onions and squash are tender.  Serve.

(This amount is essentially 1 serving)

Paleo One-Dish: Shrimp, Broccoli, Red Pepper

So, with the husband gone, I'm a master of cooking for one. Or one plus leftovers!  And, because cooking for one means I do the cooking and the cleanup, I love anything that involves only 1 pot.  So, as I continue this year to eat Paleo (ish) and clean, I'll continue to share my adventures.  I believe this one is actually Paleo..

Ingredients:
2 Tbsp. Coconut Oil
10 medium shrimp, raw (make sure they're thawed and remove the tail, etc.)
1/2 medium yellow onion
1/2 red bell pepper
1/2 broccoli crown
Garlic (powder is fine if you don't have fresh)
Red Pepper Flakes

Dice your veggies into bite-sized pieces. Melt 1 Tbsp Coconut Oil in your saucepan over medium heat. Throw in the shrimp and garlic to taste (approx. 1/8-1/4 tsp.) and saute until pink and almost done. Add remaining Coconut Oil (make sure you have enough to coat the veggies, add more if needed) and veggies along with your desired amount of red pepper flakes. Saute until the broccoli is cooked, but still firm.  Enjoy!